Ella is like me, that she has no problem hanging out with the boys. I had several boys as friends as I was growing up, and when I was younger I was much more drawn to them. They were easier to get a long with, they liked to play sports and hide and seek, and I think I loved being one of the few girls.
Ella is the only girl at the party tonight and she is still having a blast, but being a indoor swim party, I knew she would.
I am worried for her though, because I do see myself in her. I was obsessed with boys growing up. OBSESSED, I tell you. I thought they were cute, I flirted, and I wanted them to notice me. I see all of this in her already. I was very into sports once high school and middle school came around, but I still thought about boys non stop.
I had my first boyfriend in 4th or 5th grade and by the time middle school came around, I was never "single." In high school, I would even date more than one at a time (from different towns).
I don't know why I acted this way. I needed a boy to make me happy. I needed to know I was wanted. I got plenty of attention from my dad, if that's what you are thinking. I have always felt I needed a man to make me happy.
I hope I can teach my daughter(s) different. I hope that I can teach them that your happiness does not need to come from a boy. You decide your happiness.
Even now after being married almost 9 years, I have a hard time making myself happy. I struggle with being happy and doing things that are going to make me happy. My husband and children make me happy (most of the time), but I have a hard time keeping myself happy.
I just want my daughters to grow up knowing what makes them happy, and being able to do it themselves.
*You probably just learned WAY more about me than you wanted to know.*